Three Ugly SIsters

2025-04-04T11:15:45

Do you know what "Stigma" is?

If you answered YES are you sure? To be honest I had to look it up because I needed to figure out what the difference was between
  • Stigma
  • Prejudice
  • Discrimination
Honestly they are all closely related and none of them is very attractive. So, I'm going to refer to them as the "Three Ugly Sisters".
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Stigma

Now, after doing some research I hope I finally have things right. It seems that "Stigma" is a label put on people in society as a mark of disgrace. An undesirable label so to speak. Or perhaps you could say its a "box" that society puts on someone to try and limit them.
When I grew up I was "poor". Or "lower economic standing". My mother was "divorced" and a "single mother". In school I was a "nerd" or "geek". Guess what? Those labels carry a stigma associated with them.

Prejudice

Prejudice is when someone decides to make a blanket judgement against someone with a particular trait. Usually against a blanket portion of the population that carries a "label" and often with a stigma. Oh, he is poor.... Poor people are lazy. It isn't nice and it isn't always true but many people just throw a blanket on all people with a certain label all the time.

Discrimination

Of course when you throw a negative blanket over an entire group of people that often leads to them being excluded. Oh, he's poor (Stigma). I don't like poor people (Prejudice). I will exclude him from my group of friends (Discrimination).
All different, all related, and none of them are very nice.



Dealing with Stigma

Now I will tell you right now. If you try to correct everyone who looks down on others who are different in some way..... you will spend your whole life trying and very little succeeding. Some people are just wired to look down on others or on people who are different. It is very belittling and it separates into "US" and "THEM". Division isn't great and where possible I find that Unity is preferable.
However, while fighting other people's views is exceedingly challenging. There is one person's view that is of utmost importance.

YOUR OWN

Yes, I grew up poor. Yes, I didn't have a lot of the opportunities that other children did. In that way there was very little way that I could avoid the stigma associated with it. However, I certainly didn't need to believe the prejudice! I also didn't have to accept the fact that I would live with the stigma forever. Sure I started poor but because of how I grew up I learned money lessons that many many other people never did. I grew up frugal and in the end that helped me to be financially stable where many people who grew up rich never learned those lessons and are struggling.
I understood the stigma and actively took steps to get away from it. Unfortunately, some labels are harder to shake. I started off as a "Nerd" or a little "Weird". I'm not sure I will ever be able to shake those labels. However, I don't have to believe the discrimination. Being a "nerd" isn't actually a bad thing. In fact when it comes to getting computer stuff done it can be a very useful thing. Being a little "Weird"? Most people think its a bad thing. However, I've come to learn that it gives me a little flavour out of the ordinary and for the right person that can actually be a good thing. It means I don't follow the crowd like some sheep....I actually follow my own beat. And I am OK with that

In short: Outgrow the label, Own it if you can't outgrow it, and never fall for the negative lies other people may believe about it.




And try to be better than the narrowminded


Even if it is hard.
Some labels are hard to shake.
  • "Druggie"
  • "Homeless"
  • "Illness (AIDS, Cancer, etc)
  • "2SLGBTQ+"
There is a stigma associated with all those labels. But seeing the stigma is narrowminded. Seeing the person instead of the stigma? That's where understanding comes and helps prevent the prejudice and discrimination.



Its not the start its the finish that matters


And for anyone stuck with a stigma or discrimination? Well, in my case it's important to remember that its not the start that counts but the finish. Did I start off poor? Absolutely. Did I work hard to get out of that situation. Yes. Did I succeed? Well, I'm not rich but I'm happy with my current situation. Did that make it hard to find a job? Absolutely. Did I have to work harder than many others to get my foot in the door. Yes. But in the end I eventually proved my worth, got a good paying job and beat out the discrimination.
And back to my original scenario about the "Three Ugly Sisters". Well, they are always going to be out there. They will always be making people's lives miserable.
But you know what?
## **You don't have to hang out with them**
Thanks for reading ..
... always appreciated
....... and I love getting feedback too 😀
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