In the past 5 years, I've changed a lot, and there are many things I have done to change myself into this new version of me. Actually, this was not easy at all; I was devastated, but still, I did not lose any hope. I've received many unexpected things, but I've overcome them. Trying something new in life will always be difficult, as it's not something we usually do. But once I got it as a habit, everything started to become comfortable. When I got comfortable, I no longer felt bad for changing myself. I think everyone like me in life should bring about a change, and it's always for the betterment. Without change, our life will be stuck in some conditions.
In order to make our life better, change is really required. One of the good habits that I've learned throughout the year is that I can say "No" to someone. Always answering in the affirmative is not necessary. There are times when we feel uncomfortable, but out of guilt, we don't express it; we avoid speaking the truth that we actually don't want it, but we still end up saying "yes" to it. There are plenty of times when I've ended up saying "Yes" when I wanted to say "No," and it happened all because of guilt. I've always felt guilty that if I say "No," then how will the other person feel? But most importantly, I didn't care about my own feelings. I ignored my feelings for others, and it caused me to feel uncomfortable.
Once, I was talking with my friends who are girls, and one of them named "Esha" saw my earrings and said they looked beautiful on me. She had been looking for a pair of earrings like mine. I was happy and appreciated her compliment. Later on, when everyone left, she was the only one with me, and we talked for a while. After that, she asked if she could borrow my earrings, but those were my favorite earrings, and I didn't want to give them to someone else. But in the end, I ended up giving them to her.Later on, I was very sad about it because I had to give them to her when I didn't want to, but I also didn't want her to see me as a bad person. What if she thought of me as a rude person? For that reason, I felt guilty, and I let her have her way.
This was not the first time this type of thing had happened; many more times it has happened to me. One day, in art class, one of my classmates came to me and started to praise my artwork. Then she asked me to do her homework for her, and she said she knows I can't say "No" to her, as she knows I'm a really humble person. And what happened next? I did the same thing again! I didn't want to do it, but I had to do it against my will.
Then, at one point, I realized that everything was not going anywhere better, and I needed to do something better for myself. So, I started to change my habit of saying "Yes," and it was not easy in the beginning; I had to take small steps to make improvements. I also started to lose some friends, but it didn't matter to me anymore because if they were my real friends, then they would have stayed. The realization is very important for a person to improve themselves, and I've finally made it through.
Thanks for reading 🌷
