"Is this how adulthood is? Tell me that I am dreaming because how on earth am I going to survive this?"
"You will survive," I told her.
This was my friend's lamentation while we were having a conversation recently. She got a call from one of her aunts who requested to borrow some money from her knowing she had started her National Youth Service Corps (Nysc) and already calculated the government would have paid her, and she politely explained the situation on the ground to her but the aunt immediately flared up and began to say all manner of things to her.
While she was trying to reminisce about it with me, explaining what had just happened, her nephew's call came in, asking for help, which she had to decline with the excuse that they hadn't been paid yet. When she dropped the call, I talked first, as I could see her fuming with rage and annoyance.
"This is the problem of being an adult, and once they know you have started making money, they bring all issues up without considering your well-being. This is just similar to my sister, too. When she started working in Lagos and when the family knew, all bills started coming in without even allowing her to breathe."
I looked at my friend; it was obvious she didn't see it coming, not so soon, but reality had dawned on her.
"It's time to start setting aside an amount in case of emergencies like this," I teased her but with seriousness shown on my face, and then she quickly snapped me out of it, "I can't oo. I have just started my service and am only being paid for the first month. Won't they let me enjoy my money first?" She angrily muttered.
"It's for your benefit, you know?" I quickly added.
I could feel her pain because I was in such a situation before I started learning how to cope and realizing that this wasn't going to end soon but a forever thing.
I shared my experience with her and how I have started thinking about my family's responsibility but only doing what I'm capable of.
"But I'm the last born," she cut me off. I smiled and continued, "Rachael, even if you are the last born and think you just want to be collecting from your elder ones, how about your cousins, nieces, nephews, and even friends who would always come up with one issue or the other?"
I was waiting for her to say something, but she just bowed her head, and I assumed my words were hitting her, I continued, "You can't escape from responsibility, especially from your parents. The time you should be taking care of them is now, even if in a little way. You don't have to expect them to send money to you again except on a few occasions you might need their help, but not as when you used to depend on them for everything. It's a new dawn for you and you must accept it no matter what."
She felt unhappy but those words were true to her. With my conversation and the experiences I shared with her, she understood my point, and with a long sigh, she rested her back against the wall while seated on the bed and with her hands in akimbo.
"All you have to do now is to pray to God and trust Him on this journey and the reality of life as far as adulthood is concerned," I started conversing with her. She stared at me and I could see how worried she was.
I smiled, "Don't worry. You will cope. Right now, don't overdo things. Don't get too worried over this, but cheer up and accept the new stage you are in."
The conversation made me remember when we were in school and how she had watched me take responsibility for my siblings and how I was able to survive. She would always praise me then, but there was something I used to tell her, which, at first, she didn't want to accept. I would tell her, "Your time is coming, too. Be prepared for it. Don't think you will always be receiving and not giving when the time comes." We will both laugh over it while she prays for such a time not to come.
Then I reminded her about it, "Now, you see my words coming to pass, a new dawn is finally here" We both smiled while confirming my words, "Yes, you are right."
That evening, we had a deep conversation before we slept it off. It was a new dawn the next day as the reflection of the light passed through the window and we could hear noises from the outside as passersby were going and coming. It was a new day and at the same time, a reminder for my friend to dwell on our last night's conversation but not to overthink it.
Images generated from Chatgpt
