I never make posts like these. But with everything that's going on right now, a quarter of the world being in lockdown, finding myself locked out of my home, knowing people recovering through COVID-19, I just wanted to express my thoughts freely. I'm sure most of you have had similar thoughts (well, not my exact COVID-19 predicament, but generally what I have to say about ambition), so feel free to share your experience.
We humans are pretty odd creatures. We have made tons of imaginary systems and ideas for ourselves to follow, just to give ourselves some meaning or purpose. While we can discuss very many different avenues, let's talk about something more concrete - economy. Whether at a micro level, or a macro, it's all about economic growth. People are going about their way creating new things, and other people are buying these new things. We never really stop to ask if any of these new things are really required, helpful, or worse still, are harmful in the long term.
Well, most products and services out there today are certainly not necessary. There are a lot of products that can provably be harmful too.
I'm sure you have seen this hierarchy (Maslow's) before. We live in a world where the basic needs are taken care of across a lot of the world. There are still plenty of people struggling to live below the poverty line, but if you are reading this blog, it's fair to assume you have your basic needs figured out.
Notice how there's nothing in this pyramid about creating new things and getting money for them? One can argue that some people need money to achieve the psychological and self-fulfillment needs, but I have learned the hard way that for me, personally, that is not the case.
Taking a wider view, it's now clear that our indulgences has led to widespread ecological destruction, and triggered the greatest extinction event in the last 65 million years. Has it been worth it?
Over the last couple of years, it has become increasingly difficult for me to justifying going out and being productive. The carbon footprint and general wastefulness left behind in my line of work is immense, and the end product seems not worth the hassle at the end of the day. I used to be an ambitious person a decade ago, and accomplished a lot of things through selfish and egotistical motivation. To me, it seems like the best thing I could do, even before COVID-19, is to stay home and work in a profession that actually makes a basic difference whilst minimizing my carbon footprint. For now, I can delude myself by thinking, if I'm productive, I'll offer jobs to a whole bunch of people, and maybe that'll help. But I don't know how long it is before this last wall crumbles.
I have been contemplating giving away my crypto holdings anonymously. I feel I have no use for this money, and worse still, if I did use it for some luxurious indulgence, it'll just make me feel worse and guilty.
So, should we all just give up and retreat to farming and hunter-gathering? No, of course not. I'm going to continue living in a metropolitan city. Specialisation is awesome, among plenty other human innovations. I just feel, at this time, that there needs to be a balance between "progress" and "sustainability". We have gone way overboard with our imaginary problems and solutions, without ever considering the drawbacks of each. I hope once the dust settles on COVID-19, we as a species will look at some cold, hard truths and reorient how our societies function. We're a long, long way away, but I'd like to see a society where psychological and self-fulfillment needs and mental health are prioritized over GDP growth.