Nobody prepares you for the transition. They train you to be a Marine. They don't train you to stop being one.
I spent over 20 years in. Enlisted at 18. Didn't know anything else. The Marine Corps wasn't just my job. It was my life. My identity. Everything I knew about being an adult I learned in uniform.
You make it through several deployments. A combat tour. Training in dangerous and austere environments. You survive all of that. And then they hand you a DD-214 and say good luck.
They give you a week long class on how to function as a civilian. How to write a resume. How to interview. How to translate your military experience into corporate speak. Like that's the hard part. Like learning to format a resume is what's going to fuck you up.
It doesn't prepare you for the mental mind fuck to come.
You spend decades in a world with structure. Clear mission. Clear chain of command. You know exactly where you fit. You know exactly what's expected. You have purpose. You have brothers and sisters who would die for you and you for them.
Then one day you're out. And none of that exists anymore.
The civilian world doesn't operate like the military. Yeah sure, companies have mission statements. But that rarely translates down to the minions. You're just a cog. Show up. Do your tasks. Go home. No real purpose. No clear direction. Just keep the machine running until they don't need you anymore.
There's no chain of command that actually means anything. Nobody tells you where to be or what to do. You're just supposed to figure it out. Get a job. Pay bills. Be normal. Whatever the fuck normal is.
When the only adult life you've ever known is military life, civilian life feels like a foreign country. You don't speak the language. You don't know the rules. Everything you were good at doesn't seem to matter anymore.
The structure is gone. The purpose is gone. The brotherhood is gone. You go from being part of something bigger than yourself to being just another guy trying to get by. That's a hard adjustment. Harder than most people realize.
And nobody talks about it. You're supposed to be grateful you made it home. You're supposed to be fine. You served your country. Now move on. But it doesn't work like that.
Some guys come home and can't sit with their back to the door. Some can't handle crowds. Some can't sleep without seeing shit they'd rather forget. Some just feel lost. Like they don't belong anywhere anymore. The world moved on without them and now they don't fit.
The VA tries. Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn't. The system is overwhelmed. The bureaucracy is a nightmare. Some veterans get the help they need. Some fall through the cracks. Some don't make it.
I was lucky. I had family. I had support. I eventually found my way, but still struggle. Not everyone has that.
If you know a veteran who's struggling, don't just say "thank you for your service" and move on. Actually be there. Check in. Listen. That matters more than any bumper sticker or flag pin ever will.
The transition home is harder than people think. And we don't talk about it enough. Yeah, we talk about PTSD, TBI and disabilities. But we don't talk about the mental mind screw that comes from the transition back to what some call civil society.
I miss the times where we were "all equally worthless".
Thanks for reading,
Joe
Notes:
-All content is mine unless otherwise annotated.
-Images are my own unless otherwise noted.
-Photos edited using MS Paint and/or iPhone SE.
-Page Dividers from The Terminal Discord.