Humourous 001 馃槑

Joined in 07, 2022
a day ago

Greetings everyone! Today is the 22nd of June 2024, and I didn't write anything even though you're reading this article that was typed and published on the same day. You got it, right? Before picking up my keyboard to type this article around 11 pm, I had brainstormed a lot and drafted up to four articles within the space of an hour (yeah, the Shallipopi in me was awake馃槑). However, I couldn't go ahead and publish them. Why didn't I publish?Another reason I didn't write today is that I checked through all the community prompts that I usually follow, and most of them were talking about love and finance. I don't like writing about love because that thing has dealt with me very badly; it hasn't favored me, so I dodge it anytime I see it coming my way. 馃槀 As for finance? Come on, my brain doesn't know any of those crypto charts, and if I were to write about finance in the context of my fiat and living pattern in my country, it would turn into an endless complaint, and I wasn't ready for that. Oh, the dip! When is it going to end?馃槶馃槶.Another reason I didn't write today might be because I battled with writer's block. No, I don't think so. Like I said earlier, I drafted four clean articles in one hour, each with 500+ words, so it can't be writer's block. But maybe I felt it, which is why I couldn't write about finance, right? Maybe that's it because I could have done it in the normal complaint way and just dropped it like that, but I wasn't up for it.Now I remember....馃I had a very busy day. My day started around 5:00 am with a knock on my door, which turned out to be a client. After attending to the client, I had to do secretarial work for my unit in church. They needed minutes of meetings we had and even the ones we never had. So, I had to start generating most of them from my head. This task took me a lot of time because I produced 28 copies.

1 days ago

Till today I'm still very much sceptical about having my life in the most popular and populated state in Nigeria called Lagos state. During the time I was winding up my one-year service(NYSC) in Imo state, I and the pastor of the church I fellowshipped had a father-son conversation and along the line, he mentioned how he travelled to Lagos state immediately after his NYSC as any other graduate would do in search of greener pasture and according to him he spent two years there and when he saw that nothing was working for him, he decided to come back to his home village and applied for a teaching job and at the end of his story, he added "Hmmmmm"My mind pondered as I remained silent, not knowing how to tackle him with questions because I was sure he must have done something wrong or didn鈥檛 try hard enough. I had the mindset to bulldoze him with 'off' questions but no, he's my spiritual head and I should save some respect.The truth is that, that wasn鈥檛 my first time hearing how tough and competitive Lagos is but I couldn鈥檛 just phantom how a highly spirited clergy would go to Lagos and fail. That thought remained with me until I started looking for jobs after my NYSC.As life would have it, I got a sure job offer from an Uncle, Uncle Ezekiel who was living in Lagos working as a top staff in an insurance company and wanted me to join him. I was choiceless because I needed just any job even when Insurance and Marketing weren't my discipline. He helped me to process everything and at the final stage, I was called to travel down to Lagos for a one-week training. I was glad because finally I was going to the much talked about Lagos; the land of numerous opportunities.The travelling day came, I began the journey as early as 5:00am in order to get there before night. After about 8hrs of non-stop driving, we got held up in traffic and just like a play, we stayed there for over an hour with our shirts soaked in sweat because there wasn't an Air conditioner in the car and even when the windows were opened, it was as if the air penetrating

2 days ago

Greetings!When I read the prompt announcement of this article, I felt like the publisher was talking to me directly because I've faced challenges many times, especially with sickness, and no one knew apart from my brother who was living with me on an "off and on" pattern.The last sickness I had, which was two years ago if I'm not mistaken, came at a time when my immediate younger brother was no longer as stable in the house as he used to be. He had been traveling here and there for his hustling. The sickness came and held me so bad that I found it hard to come outside the house or open my workplace, which was within the compound. It's not like it was so bad at the initial stage that I couldn't walk out or talk; no, it was just there, dealing with me, and I didn't want anyone else to know because I hate that sympathetic thing. I don't usually have friends that come around to visit; most of my friends are online.One day came and went, and I didn't allow anybody to see me. Only one person in the compound asked about me, and that was because he came to collect the phone charger he had used to charge his phone in my house the previous night. When he saw my mood, I just told him I was battling a minor fever. Yeah, that was what I thought it was until it worsened the following day to the extent that I found it hard to walk out to get drugs from the chemist shop close to me because of a heavy cold. I was suffering inside but still didn't want anybody to know because I don't want people telling me that "sorry" and peeping into life and also I knew I wasn't going to die. On the night of the second day, when the pain in my stomach and the cold were severe, my brother walked into the house around 9:30 pm with his traveling bag. Immediately he saw me and asked what was up, he went to get more drugs and Lucozade Boost for me, which I struggled to take.That particular sickness taught me a lesson to be less secretive and private, especially about health issues. I knew I wouldn't have died, but if my brother hadn't come that night, I would have reached hell, and maybe plac

2 days ago

Greetings! The kind of music I grew up with, I mean the native music, was fun to listen to and watch because of the storylines they came with. Most of them were purely stories, both fictional and based on real-life events.Today, I want to share one of the stories I know from a song. It's one of those that I find so interesting because, according to our fathers, the event really happened, but to me, it still appears as pure fiction.I N A L UIn the village way back in the early 90s, there lived a man called One a particular morning, the wife was about to cook beans and she checked the keg for red oil, only to find it empty. She went to her husband, Inalu, and asked him to go to the bush to cut palm fruits so she could make red oil from it to be used in preparing beans. Unfortunately, that day was EKE, their market day, on which Inalu forbade climbing palm trees. This was a law he inherited from his fathers, who told him that something bad would happen if he violated it. He reminded his wife of this, although she was already aware, but she was adamant and refused to consider cooking other meals that's void of red oil for that day. She demanded that he get her palm fruits to make oil to cook beans, or she would take the children and leave the house.Inalu pleaded with her to prepare an alternative food that didn't require red oil, but she remained adamant, suggesting she had ulterior was damn obvious.The morning became very troubling for Inalu. He pondered over the situation but couldn鈥檛 bear the thought of breaking the law. After much deliberation, he decided to consult a native doctor to determine if something bad would really happen if he climbed the tree. The native doctor responded with a parable and ultimately advised him to follow his heart.Not wanting to lose his family, Inalu made up his mind to break the law and climb the palm tree on the market day. He went to the bush, found a palm tree with ripe fruits, and approached it. As he was about to install his climbing rope, he paused for a moment, reflecting on his life, his family, and the potent

3 days ago

Greetings! If it's right to say I became a minimalist from birth, I think I would boast of that because, from what I know, I started practicing minimalism from a very tender age, and that鈥檚 totally due to the not-so-rich family background I came from. We were very poor, the only difference we had from others was that there was food in the house due to our farms, and even from that, we were never allowed to waste food unless we were ready to receive a twelve-month sermon on the importance of managing food. Lol.When I came of age, i.e when I started living alone and sourcing my own money and food, I saw that there was a big need to fully continue with what I learned from home while growing up. Otherwise, things would be choky, and I might not survive calling home to beg for food or begging friends for food. So that鈥檚 it. One of my major reasons for choosing a minimalist lifestyle is to The 'economical way' here means that even when it comes to the things I need, such as feeding, I am very mindful of how I go about it to save some resources for future use....when it comes to feeding, I settle down to plan and make food that will last me a long while with just one cooking session. You can never see me cook at 9 a.m., another one at 12 noon, another one at 3 p.m., and dinner at 6 p.m. No way! I cook a very lasting meal and save up some gas.I have a neighbor that always comes asking to borrow my gas cylinder because his own is exhausted. That鈥檚 because he cooks 'irrelevant' meals every now and then, and the funniest thing is that he complains about how his gas is always exhausting before the actual time it ought to, which he knows the cause but can鈥檛 just stop.Buy quality and rest for eternity:I always use the belt I bought in 2018 as an example of this. Before I boug

3 days ago

Returning to fame has been the biggest challenging task for Stanley, popularly known by his stage name Stanbaba who's into comic skits and he has a large number of followers both on YouTube, Instagram and Facebook. He lost his flow when his newly married wife gave birth through cesarean section where he spent everything in his account to save his wife and the newly born baby. Ever since the family saga which took him off for 1 year, he tried pushing back to fame with different clips but every single clip he dropped didn't get half of the views and engagement that he usually gets on one post when he was very active.On a Saturday morning, time was 5:00 am when he woke up with a thought he had gotten from his dream as a way forward to his break out. He tapped his wife who was still snoring deeply. She flickered, muffled some words murmured that were only understandable by her. "Please wake up. There's an idea I just got and I want to implement it today""Idea? On the family or your skit revival means?""It's on the revival of my career and I...I...I... I don't know how it's going to end up because others have done it and not all of them came out well, but it's worth trying""Ummmmm... you're going to be deeply involved in this and it's all about chasing clout with clowns which you and other media persons are going to be the clowns""It's very simple, you're going to put out a video of me lying in a coffin, with cotton wools on my nostrils, mouth and ears, acting dead and after my news goes viral by social media freaked people, I would come out and say it's a prank"