Hello there. Most of my posts are about historical museums, rich people’s lavish castles, and their ridiculously impractical wigs that, for some reason, were all the rage back in the day. But history isn’t just gold, carriages, and powdered aristocrats. Today, I’m talking about a different kind of greatness – technological greatness. Or, more specifically – how to polish my… wait, can I even say that here? Fine, I’ll restrain myself. But I probably won’t restrain myself from a little free advertising – want to feel fresh and enjoy a breeze between your legs? Get yourself a Manscape. At this rate, I wouldn’t be surprised if, in 50 years, there’s a museum for it. Or more likely, museums will go fully virtual, and we’ll be "exploring" them through VR while lying on the couch, simulating activity. We’re already halfway there.

Welcome back. Did you miss reading my nonsense? Okay. I'm no Doctor Who, but welcome to my TARDIS - my blog. Can't walk you through time and space yet, but I promise I'm working on it. My biggest enemies aren't Daleks, they're my internet connection, electricity and my phone battery. Frankly, it's far more terrifying than an escaped TARDIS or a robot with lasers. You write something for hours and bam - the power goes out, the battery drops and all your hard work becomes a distant memory... I prefer the robot to that. Today, however, my TARDIS "came across" a diary. A diary left by a grandmother who had an affair with a Dutch rich man from the 1930s - a man whose DNA has the energy of IKEA embedded in it. Did I grab your attention? Okay, get on. Pupuuuu, pupuuu. (Yes, it sounds more like a Pokémon than a time machine, but use your imagination.)

Now, let me show you a temple. A temple that, for some of you - especially us parents... might feel like a nightmare. And for those who've watched too many horror movies, like me, haha. You probably remember classics like "Child’s Play", "Annabelle", and "The Silence". What do they have in common with this museum, you ask? Think about it. Porcelain, big eyes, plastic, and the horror and nightmares that come when you see them. You imagine their heads turning or their eyes following you everywhere. Pretty terrifying, especially late at night in the dark. Just thinking about it gives me chills. Now, picture an entire museum filled with dolls.

Welcome. Close your eyes... Now imagine this. Raindrops ringing as they hit the wet bike lanes. The smell of aromatic coffee floating in the air. Now, open your eyes... Sun. Yes. Is it real or not? Netherlands, where Christmas is sunny, and summer is rainy. You have no choice but to wear sunglasses. My eyes haven’t seen sunlight in so long. But I’m not here to talk about a sunny day... I’m not a meteorologist or a prophet. Well, maybe I’ll talk about it a little.

And here I am again - another dish from the world of the rich. If you didn't get the hint from my previous posts, my goal is not to ridicule tourist attractions (well, maybe a little), but to show you around them with the right amount of humor. After all, there's a grain of truth in every joke, right?

"If all of the kings had their queens on the throne... We would pop champagne and raise a toast!"🎵Or... not quite. Welcome to my next sarcastic adventure, haha! Who wants to feel like a king or queen? Admit it right now, haha! Probably quite a few of you. Today we're going to dive into the world of the rich - in one of the biggest castles in the Netherlands - the Kasteel de Haar. Okay dears, we won't be the main characters in a medieval story, we won't be rich (alas), but it's not forbidden to dream. See, an actress married a prince - so it can happen to anyone... if you're pretty lucky (and have a strategic wedding agency, haha).