At first, I didn't understand or... let's say I didn't want to understand why my mom did the things she did. How those little things seem to bring a smile to her face. Gardening, arranging and rearranging, and whatnot! It was always stressful in my eyes when I found her doing them, but I had no problem with that, but with something else.Participating!I didn't understand why she would ask me to plant something, weed out something, and to water the plants. "Why are we disturbing ourselves when there are people selling these things?"* I would ask silently, and then I had one answer always pop up, "Stinginess". Lol, I thought my mom was stingy when it came to planting the food we eat because we could have easily accessed them at the market. And then, it came with clothes. She always gave them out and urged us to do the same, but I didn't understand why I had to give out my favorite clothes. I mean, there are mine, right? Or is it because she got them for me, I'd say with a frown.But, what I didn't know then was that there was indeed a beauty in gardening, giving out and living in simplicity. I always find them boring and very hectic! However, I got to understand when I first gave out a dress of mine and saw the look of happiness on the person's face. For some unknown reason, that person's smile melted my heart, and I wanted to give out more, shoes, sandals, and more. I derived strange heartwarming happiness from them. It was beautiful and unexplainable.And when it comes to planting what I eat, gosh! I couldn't help smiling from ear to ear when the beans I planted grew up healthy because I added enough cow dung to it and watered it daily as my mom had instructed. I felt like a proud mother who was asked to make a speech at her daughter/son's wedding when it germinated well and was ready for harvest.Embracing natur

Unlike yesterday's walk to the market, today, I decided to step out and enjoy the presence of nature. Seeing the beauty of the sky and the greenery that surrounded me helped as usual with my emotions.The clear road, how the trees and flowers moved swiftly like they could hear the rhythm and amazing of the music I was listening to, and the clear sky reminded me that there'll be a light at the end and with that, I am doing my best, to be cheerful, and to continue living life as I hope for the best.I am glad I was able to take this walk before getting back home because I was left with a satisfactory smile on my lips. Nature is truly the best!Image Used Is Mine

After yesterday's I was able to take a walk to the market to get things needed for cooking and also breathe in nature's air and I am glad I did because it helped a bit to loosen the wrap of grieve on me. When I got to the market, I took a picture of the market entrance when I was waiting for my turn, and after that, I headed toward home with a tired look because i was indeed drained physically and emotionally.The walk did help, though I'd have to massage my feet later.Image Used Is Mine

There's a lot I want to say. There are so many questions I need answers to, but the truth is that deep inside, I know the answer to, still I can't help asking;"Is that how people die?"If I were told that my day would begin and end with this, I would argue, cuss and move away. No one could tell and questions like;"Was she sick?"How can someone who made her daughter's hair yesterday in preparation for her graduation end up dying just some hours ago. I have cried and kept thinking. I am finding it hard to believe until the cries of my relatives fill my ears. Yep! She is dead and gone. There's no coming back to meet her husband or children. She left this world without even looking back? Or did she?It is sad news for me today has my uncle's wife body hit the mortuary as the preparation of burial rites has been done.I am still trying to process things, but the harder I try, the more I get hit by reality. I am not dreaming. I felt how the hot tears clung onto my cheek and I did nothing to wipe them off. I needed to be strong but for now, I am letting the river flow.To do this, I decided to write and let me emotions flow with music as my aid and I do hope the strength to care for those she left behind will be dished out soon, cos I am tired. Life! You never know when it'll end. For her, I chose these songs.*How do I say goodbye?How do I say goodbye when a young soul is gone? What would we tell the children she left behind? I don't know how to and don't want to. Sadness grips me and I really want to sleep and wake up to good news. How can the husband and children say goodbye when she won't be coming back?Visiting hoursAnd then I wish heaven has visiting hours because I am still gobsmacked. I am shattered and lost.GoodbyeGoodbye because she was a mom, a wife, someone's sister, best friend and duaghter.Rest in perfect peace. We shall meet, one day.***Videos From #YouTube and [Image-Source]

Plans made for the day came with an unexpected outcome, taking off the original plan. Here, that's me. I feel like whenever I plan on having a day in, there's so much that ends up taking me out and making me super busy. Well, I have to thank my activities for the day because I was able to make it to 10k plus with my steps.No pain, no gain. Hell, yeah! This pain has a gain. Keeping healthy and safe has always been the goal. So, I set out very early, but the sun still made it out before I did, and I couldn't help the beautiful white dots that splashed around the blue sky like an artist paint. I loved it and took a nice picture of it.I think watching the sky for a minute or two did help ginger me as I edged toward my activities for the day. I found myself wearing a huge smile as I went out.Coming back, I was met with another stunning view. Nature seems to know exactly when to make one go gaga in its beauty. With the sun almost hiding it claws from the presence of humans, I quickly took a shot of it to remember this day and the happening that occurred.Having to enjoy both the light and almost dark filled hours of the day is heartwarming.Images used are mine

"I think I found it!""With a huge smile on her lips, Alicia replied, "Okay...""If anyone had told me just a year ago that I'll have the thoughts I have now and even act on them, I would have laughed out loud and given the person a hug for trying to read my life. I can't believe this!"Letting out a deep sigh, Debbie paused the TV show and concentrated on Alicia. "What are you yapping about this time around, uhn? You know this is super unfair! Today is supposed to be your day of housing me as we both enjoy the continuation of the TV show we saw at my place last Sunday. Remember? We made it a tradition just a year ago after we became more than work buddies but friends to watch a TV show...""Every Sunday since it is our off day. I remember that well, Madame Debbie. I know we both started at my place on the first Sunday, then your place and vice-versa. I remember it all, Miss."Puffing out air from her mouth like a woman in labor, Alicia continued ,"I didn't mean to disturb our show, but I remembered the question you asked me at the office 3 days ago. It has been bugging me, but then the answer came to me while we were watching this show. I now know why there is a huge difference in my attitude toward life."* She replied."Hmmm, I remember asking you why you now care so much for your family, respect them, and... this word is kinda weird saying it out to you. And lo… love them?""Yeah. That's the question, and I found an answer to it. I am super sure that it was that moment we began that show that changed everything."*"Interesting... Now, I am more curious than ever. This TV show can wait. I want to know about that Tv show that turned the brick wall Alicia into a soft j