Merry Christmas and Happy New Years!

2023-12-25T18:22:09

Merry Christmas and a Happy New year! This year has been both one of the most difficult and the most meaningful years of my life. It was one of the most difficult because my father got sick and almost died and it was really tough for a while...

Watching my father go through all his hardship was extremely hard on me, and seeing him get better was also extremely inspiring, I'm so grateful that he made it through all that and that we have more time together!

Every day I'm so grateful to have another opportunity to be here with both of my parents, the rest of my family, my friends and myself. I turned 40 years old this year and sometimes I wish I was younger, but... Many don't get that same opportunity to get this old and I'm glad I've been able to be here this long and make so many great memories.

After my father started getting better I started getting out and socializing a lot more and I also reconnected with some old friends and had some of the most powerful "synchronicities" and spiritual experiences in my life.

The synchronicities or spiritual experiences that I had made me really feel like I have some kind of connection or communication with a "higher power", whether you want to call it "God" or "The Universe" or "Source" or something else, and that is one of the most amazing feelings I've ever felt to feel like that.

For so much of my life I was very skeptical of such kinds of things to the point of almost verging on denial... And, it took me my whole life, but I really truly finally feel like I "know" that something more is going on and many people unfortunately never get that kind of realization, so I do feel very lucky and thankful that I was able to learn this.

I've also made a lot of progress with improving my OCD this year and just recently found a video online that helped a lot more and now I know what I need to do... Whether I will have enough courage to be able to do it is another story, time will tell in regard to that... Yet, it really does feel awesome to feel like I finally know what I need to do in order to heal!

I have a hunch that some more good things are going to happen soon and I'm super excited and optimistic to see what this next year has in store and I hope you all have a most wonderful and happy New Year as well! Tons of love to you and everyone always!

PS... A lil poem I just typed up. Merry Christmas! No need for a wish list, I'm happy and grateful for everything I've got. It sure is bliss to be like this and to no longer feel lost. On a special path in this existence with persistence, what a difference thank you to the Universe/Source/God. So happy to be here with my family and friends another day, that is the ultimate gift I insist... Love you all so much forever even after I'm "gone". ❤️

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In recent times I've been so incredibly happy and grateful it's almost hard to believe... My whole life I never knew I could be like this and wish I knew sooner, but at least I finally figured it out!

And... I've been thinking that if I ever get lucky enough to have a legit romantic relationship or a child or children that my happiness and gratefulness will be even more off the charts to the point that it's even more hard to believe especially considering how much adversity and struggle I've went through in my life including where there were times (8 years of depression) I wished I was dead and never thought I'd be where I am now.

PS... This picture may not look like much to most, but it's special to me... It's some kind of phenomena or "anomaly" and I've never seen it happen before. The sun should be WAY smaller... Like 1/10th the size or so, I dunno what happened but somehow it reflected or refracted and became huge and there's like light rings around it and... Also, there's a hidden extra meaning for me cause there's an interesting legend from the Yavapai in relation to where the sun is that fits into what I said previously about hopefully having a family of my own someday.

I have a dream/goal that is very special and meaningful and I dunno if it will ever happen... Though, I'm going to do my best to try to see that it does happen and hopefully the Universe/God/Source allows it or even helps me along the way! ❤️ Oh, also... If it never does happen, that's okay too... I'm still going to be so incredibly happy and grateful that it's mind boggling either way! 😁

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